Muppetology 101: Intro to Gorg Culture

Greetings class! The semester is winding down and I’ve already entered my summer mindset (combining a summer mindset with a Muppet Mindset has fantastic results). As such, I’ve brought in yet another guest professor for this week’s lecture. Maxwell Jessop, although quite young, already has his Bachelor’s degree in Muppetology from good old MMIT (Muppet Mindset Institute of Technology) and is incredibly adept and eager to teach you. Enjoy him and pay attention! There won’t be a quiz, but it’s just good manners.
Maxwell Jessop – The Gorgs have been an integral part of Fraggle Rock with a history that goes back farther than we know. I’ve done my research and prepared for you a fun and intelligently made history that will show you that their culture is more complicated than you think! Just outside of Fraggle Rock lies the Gorg’s Castle and Gorg’s Garden where the current Gorgish dynasty live, consisting of ex-King Pa Gorg, Queen Ma Gorg, and once Prince now King Junior Gorg.
Gorgs, the self-proclaimed rulers of the universe, have been around for over 538 years with kings and queens ruling a dynasty most likely lasting at least 513 years. There have been six dynasties and three known kings who have ruled them. King Gorgus the Great ruled the first dynasty and is great-great grandfather to Pa Gorg, father of current king Junior Gorg. Unlike other monarchies, kings are not chosen once the current king dies but are instead passed down once the mystic Nirvana Tree’s leaves have fallen off. Exceptions are made, however, most notably when the Royal Kazoo must be blown by the predicted king. If it cannot produce music, the predicted king is banished to the swamp for 100 years.
Like the Nirvana Tree, the Gorgs also obtain and believe in other magical items and beings. Specifically, the Gorgs use Gorg Youth and Beauty Cream, made from radishes, to keep them from vanishing completely and becoming invisible. The Trash Heap has used this connection to unify the Fraggles, Gorgs, and Doozers. It is also believed by the Gorgs that Sir Hubris, a mysterious character that may or may not exist, went off to explore the realm, crowned Gorgus king, and will come back and force the Gorgs’ reign as rulers to be over.
As of the Pa Gorg/Ma Gorg dynasty, Pa, Ma, and Junior Gorg appear to be the only Gorgs–at least the only ones ever seen. Junior Gorg has occasionally said he does not know where the other Gorgs are and when or if they will return.
The Gorg’s Garden is the home base, if you will, of the kings of the Gorg dynasties. It houses a magnificent castle and a large garden mostly used for harvesting radishes. As with all places in the Fraggle universe, the Gorgs’ Garden is also filled with rare flora and fauna. Along with the Nirvana Tree, another tree is home to red, bird-like tree creatures. The garden is also home to the oracle of the Fraggles, Marjory the Trash Heap and her rat-like assistants Philo and Gunge.
The Gorgs are also considered very trusting due to their Solemn Gorg Oath, which acts as a permanently binding contract from which the swearer cannot be broken or released, even in the case of fraud. The only way to reverse it is for all parties to swear to a new counteractive arrangement. Junior Gorg famously fell prey to the swindler Wander McMooch due to this Solemn Oath.
All in all, despite their flaws, the Gorgs are interesting creatures and they should be more widely known. If only they would come to our world so we could study them more closely.
The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier,

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